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It is an obligation to educate our children the principles of religion:
Dear brothers, I will continue discussing the crucial and important topic we started few weeks ago, which is The Islamic Household. When man gains happiness at home, he will be happy at work, and he will be more productive in his career. As you know the household makes the solid ground of any society, because the family is the backbone of any society, so when it is right, the society will be right as well.
Dear brother, the responsibility of the parents towards their families is stressed in the Noble Quran; Allah the Almighty says:
﴾ O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell)﴿
The parental responsibility is substantial, and it is a diversified multi-task mission, given raising the children according to Islam tops all the other tasks. You should raise your sons, daughters and family members according to the Islamic method and the Prophetic Sunnah.
Dear brother, you should teach your son since the minute he reaches maturity the fundamentals of faith, the cornerstones of Islam and the rulings of Shari'ah (Islamic Law). As for the fundamentals of faith, they include believing in Allah the Almighty as the Creator, the Educator and the Manager of affairs, believing in His Beautiful Names and Exalted Attributes, believing in the Hereafter, believing in Messengers, peace be upon them, believing in the Divine Books, believing in Angels and believing in Qada' and Qadar (the Divine Preordainment and Predestination). Then, you should teach him the fundamentals of Islam which include the acts of worship such as Salah (prayer), Sawm (fasting), Hajj (pilgrimage), Zakat. You should teach him the fundamentals of this exalted religion including Aqeedah, Shari'ah, acts of worship, transactions and morals.
Tawheed is the ground of the religion:
Dear brother, this is the responsibility of parents. I would like to refer to what the authenticated Prophetic texts instruct us about this responsibility.
((Al-Hakim reported that Ibn Abbas narrated that the Prophet PBUH said: "Let the first phrase spoken by your children be 'There is no deity worthy of worship but Allah Alone'.))
At-Tawheed (believing that there is no Deity, worthy of worship by Allah Alone) is the gist of religion, given any sin, corruption or deviation is but a result of Shirk (associating partners with Allah in worship). Man should believe that there is no Deity but Allah Alone, that He is One and the Lord in heavens and on earth and that all matters are in His Hand.
﴾ and to Him return all affairs (for decision).﴿
Man should believe that Allah the Almighty is Ar-Rafi' (The Exalter), Al-Khafid (The Abaser), Al-Mu'izz (The Bestower of Honor), Al-Muthil (The Humiliator), Al-Mu'ti (The Giver), Al-Mani' (The Preventer), Al-Qabid (The Withholder) and Al-Basit (The Expander). Man should also believe that Tawheed is the ultimate knowledge and that Tawheed with Ibadat (acts of worship) are the essence of the religion.
﴾ Worship Allah! You have no other Ilah (God) but Him. (La ilaha ill-Allah: none has the right to be worshipped but Allah).﴿
﴾ Say (O Muhammad PBUH): "It is revealed to me that your Ilah (God) is only one Ilah (God - Allah). ﴿
The summary of the Noble Quran is that there is no Deity worthy of worship but Allah Alone. Explaining this concept takes a long time and needs lots of examples to elaborate it. One of these examples is the story of our Master Yusuf PBUH; the events and the moral of this story urge us to believe that there is no Deity worthy of worship but Allah Alone. The moral of this story is indicated in some Ayat of Surat Yusuf PBUH:
﴾ And Allah has full power and control over His Affairs, but most of men know not.﴿
The same goes for the story of our Master Musa (Moses PBUH), for its morals tell us that all matters are in the Hand of Allah…
﴾But when you fear for him, then cast him into the river and fear not, nor grieve.﴿
Why did Allah ask her not to fear? It is because Allah was with him (i.e. with Musa PBUH)…
﴾Nor grieve. Verily! We shall bring him back to you, and shall make him one of (Our) Messengers."﴿
The same goes for the story of our master Yunus PBUH when he was swallowed by the whale…
﴾ But he cried through the darkness (saying): La ilaha illa Anta [none has the right to be worshipped but You (O Allah)], Glorified (and Exalted) are You [above all that (evil) they associate with You]. Truly, I have been of the wrong-doers."* So We answered his call, and delivered him from the distress. And thus We do deliver the believers (who believe in the Oneness of Allah, abstain from evil and work righteousness).﴿
Tawheed is a word whose explanation takes a long time. The signs in this universe shed light on this word. Furthermore, the stories of the Prophets, peace be upon them, shed light on this word. Also, the biography of the Noble companions shed light on this word. Actually, even the daily events shed light on this word, and the Quranic Ayat shed light on this word. To this effect the Prophet PBUH said:
((Let the first phrase spoken by your children be 'There is no deity worthy of worship but Allah Alone'.))
When people repeat a word abundantly, it may lose some of its meaning. All people say "La Ilaha Ialla Allah" (There is no Deity worthy of worship but Allah Alone), and sometimes they say it when they are angry, but do we really know the meaning of this clause? This clause sums up the entire religion. When you fear a human being and you disobey Allah out of that fear, this means that you do not understand the meaning of this clause, simply because no human being can do any harm to you, benefit you, hurt you, stall or advance anything without Allah's Leave. Thus, when you believe that there is no Deity worthy of worship but Allah Alone, all your fears will go away. What did our Master Hud PBUH say?
﴾ So plot against me, all of you, and give me no respite* "I put my trust in Allah, my Lord and your Lord! There is not a moving (living) creature but He has grasp of its forelock. Verily, my Lord is on the Straight Path (the truth).﴿
Dear brother, it is out a Prophetic Sunnah that when one of us is bestowed with a newborn baby to say Adhan (calling of Salah) in his right ear, and then to offer Iqamah in his left ear. The first thing the newborn baby should hear is Tawheed, and this was instructed by the Prophet PBUH who did that himself:
((Ibn Abbas narrated that the Prophet PBUH said: "Obey Allah, abstain from sins and order your children to follow Allah's Commands and refrain from His Prohibition, so that you may ward off yourselves and theirs against Hell-fire))
This Hadith is narrated by Ibn Abbas:
((Obey Allah, abstain from sins and order your children to follow Allah's Commands and to refrain from His Prohibitions, so that you may ward off yourselves and theirs against Hell-fire))
Raising the children on loving Salah, Quran, the Prophet and His family:
As for the acts of worship, the Prophet PBUH instructed us to command our children to perform Salah when they become 7 years old and to punish them upon leaving it when they become 10 years old:
(('Amr bin Shu'aib reported on his father's authority that his grandfather (may Allah be pleased with him) said: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "Command your children to perform Salat (prayer) when they are seven years old, and beat them for (not offering) it when they are ten, and do not let (boys and girls) sleep together".))
At-Tabarani reported that our Master Ali bin Abu Talib, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated that the Prophet PBUH said:
((Train your children to acquire three characteristics: love of your Prophet, …))
When the child is young, and due to his nature and psychological characteristics, he tends to look up to an exemplary character in his life, so unless you raise him to love the Prophet PBUH, to love his family and to love the believers, he will grow up loving other people whose morals, habits, behavior, creed, lifestyle and way of thinking are disgusting. Your child is like a vessel, so unless you fill this vessel with exalted characters who are coherent to virtue, this vessel will be filled up with trivial and bad characters who will capture your child's attention to something which has nothing to do with religion.
Dear believers, the Prophet's instruction is as follows:
((Train your children to acquire three characteristics: love of your Prophet, love of his family and reading the Qur'aan, …))
Our righteous ancestors during the prime of the Islamic world used to teach children the Noble Quran (at an early age), and by memorizing the Quran, the child will acquire eloquence, his faith will be deeply rooted, his conducts will be exaltedly cultivated and his character will thrive. The methodology of Islamic education is based n teaching children the Noble Quran, and thank to Allah, this country is full of institutes where children are able to learn the Noble Quran and through which they will receive all the Quranic knowledge and morals. So I encourage every father to pay heed in this regard.
((Train your children to acquire three characteristics: love of your Prophet, love of his family and reading the Qur'aan, for the bearers of the Qur'aan will be in the shade of Allaah on the Day when there will be no shade except His, with His Prophets and His chosen ones))
Children must learn the Prophetic biography:
Dear brother, after you teach your child to love the Prophet PBUH, and after you teach him Salah, the fundamentals of faith, the pillars of Islam and the great Divine Signs in the universe which indicate Allah's Existence, you should teach him the Prophetic biography, but why is that? It is because the Prophet PBUH is a walking Quran (in his exalted conducts), he is our good example, the exalted exemplar and the role model, and because the exalted conducts of the Prophet PBUH reflect the morals of Islam which are derived from the Noble Quran.
We should teach our children how the Prophet PBUH used to live, how he used to deal with his family, how he PBUH used to smile whenever he entered his house, how he used to lift his cloak (so that he would not wake up his family members), and he used to greet the children and to act like a child when he was among them.
The Prophet PBUH used to hold his stuff and he would never abstain from helping the one in need, the weak man or the wretched person.
((It was decided that the companions would sacrifice a lamb for dinner. One of them volunteered: "I will sacrifice the lamb." Another said: "I will skin it." and The Prophet PBUH said: "I will gather the wood from the desert." So the group said: "O Messenger of Allah, it is not becoming of you to discomfort yourself as such. You rest. We will be honored to do all this on our own." The Prophet PBUH answered: "I know that you are eager to do it all, but Allah is not pleased with the slave who distinguishes between himself and his companions, and considers himself better than sh3er."))
This is but a powerful lesson to all of us. I told you last week the story of an Arab prince who came to the Prophet PBUH, so the Prophet PBUH took off his cloak and threw it to him and said, "Sit on it", but the man, who was the chief of his tribe, took the cloak and put it on his face, then he wept and kissed it and said, "May Allah honor you as you honored me; I would never sit on your cloak", then he gave it back to the Prophet PBUH, then the Prophet PBUH said:
((If a generous man comes to you, be generous to him))
If you read the Prophetic biography attentively, carefully and delicately, and if you pay attention to the details, you will find endless lessons and morals to learn from. Let alone, it contains Prophetic instructions and teachings which are very rich. In fact, no other human being will ever be able to offer the humanity as many lessons, stances and morals as the Prophet PBUH did. The Prophet PBUH said:
((Train your children to acquire three characteristics: love of your Prophet, …))
This means that you should teach your children the Prophetic biography, lest how can you teach your son to love the Prophet PBUH? Will you say to him, "O son, love the Prophet PBUH." This is nonsense, because even if you say to him love the Prophet PBUH thousands of times, and he says back to you, "I love him", this is not the point. You should show your child the perfection, the mercy, the humility and the justice of the Prophet PBUH:
((…By the One in whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, if Fatimah bint Muhammad were to steal, I would cut off her hand."))
This reflects justice and mercy.
((Once, during the night, the people of Medina got afraid (of a sound). So the people went towards that sound, but the Prophet (PBUH) having gone to that sound before them, met them while he was saying, "Do not be afraid, do not be afraid."))
This incident shows how brave the Prophet PBUH was. In Hunain Battle, he PBUH said:
((I am the Prophet (PBUH) undoubtedly; I am the son of 'Abdul Muttalib.))
The Prophet PBUH used to be the closest to the enemies.
I would like to stress this point again, how will you instill the love of the Prophet PBUH in your son's heart and mind? Will you keep saying to him, "O son, love the Prophet PBUH", which is pointless? Instead, you should teach him about the stances the Prophet PBUH took, and you should teach him about his humility, asceticism, care towards sh3er, tenderness and mercy, so when you tell your son about these traits and about his conducts, he will love him, but do you know why? It is because man by nature loves perfection, and it is part of his Fitrah (an inborn natural predisposition which cannot change, and which exists at birth in all human beings. It is inclined towards right action and submission to Allah, the One Deity):
((O Dawood, remind my servants of my blessings, as souls are molded to love the benefactor, and hate the hurtful))
Abu Jahl was the fieriest enemy of the Prophet among the infidels. He followed various ways to hurt the Prophet PBUH and to degrade the companions, may Allah be pleased with them, through acts of aggression against them. However, when Ikrimah, may Allah be pleased with him, came to announce his Islam before the Prophet PBUH, what did the Noble Prophet PBUH say?
((Ikrima bin Abi-Jahl will come to you as Migrant believer so do not curse his father as cursing the dead hurts the feelings of his alive relatives and does not reach the deceased.))
These are the perfect conducts. What did the Noble Prophet PBUH say?
((…so do not curse his father as cursing the dead hurts the feelings of his alive relatives and does not reach the deceased.))
The Prophet PBUH considered the feelings of Ikrimah as a son towards his father.
Educating children about the right values, the good conducts and discipline:
Dear brother, when the Prophet PBUH said:
((Train your children to acquire three characteristics: love of your Prophet, …))
This means that you should teach your children the biography of the Prophet PBUH. You can do that by sitting with them and reading stories of his biography. Also, you can, tell them about his stances and describe to them his exalted traits.
Bear in mind that the house which does not have a book about the Prophetic biography is a lifeless house. You are a Muslim, and this is your Prophet PBUH and the exalted example to followed. Not to mention, he is the beloved to Al-Haqq, the Master of all mankind, the best among Adam's children and the one who fulfilled the trust, conveyed the Divine Message, advised the Ummah, relieved the hardship and fought in the Cause of Allah, so do his the stances, battles, traits, exalted conducts, virtues and perfections not deserve to be taught to your children? One will not love the Prophet PBUH unless he knows him, and this fact is indicated in the Noble Quran:
﴾ Or is it that they did not recognize their Messenger (Muhammad PBUH) ﴿
What should you do? You should know the Prophet PBUH and let your son know him as well. Loving the Prophet PBUH and teaching your children to love him is achieved by reading the Prophetic biography, the biography of the Noble companions and the biography of the exalted Islamic characters which contains their asceticism, their jealousy (for this religion), their concern (about Islam), their humbleness and their heroic acts.
Unless you fill the heart of the young man with the stories of the exalted unique characters, other trivial characters will reach his heart, and your son might become fascinated with people of different tangible talents, who have no sense of morals or values, but they lead him to take them as examples and to love them.
Dear brother, Sa'd bin Abi Waqqas, may Allah be pleased with him, used to say, "We used to teach our children about the battles of the Prophet PBUH the way we teach them a Surah of the Quran." What did Imam Al-Ghazali, the explicit proof of Islam, say? He advised people to teach their children the Noble Quran, the Prophetic Sunnah, the stories of the righteous people and the religious rulings on top of which are the rulings of Salah.
This should be the educational method of every parent. Ibn Khaldoun (the establisher of social science) made clear the importance of teaching children the Noble Quran and of making them memorize it by heart. Avicenna (the scientist and the philosopher) stressed the positive influence of teaching the child the Noble Quran, and how it improves his language and instills faith in his heart.
A man called Al-Fadl bin Zaid saw a handsome young man and sensed bravery and cleverness in him, so he asked his mother how she raised him to which she answered, "When he became 5 years old, I entrusted him to a mentor to teach him the Noble Quran, and I taught him about the heroic exploits of his people and ancestors. Then when he reached maturity, I taught him how to ride horses until he became a courageous knight, and he spent his time wandering between houses listening to the supplications of the oppressed."
If our parents are righteous then our Ummah will be fine because the upbringing of the rising generations will be on a solid ground of right values, good conducts and discipline, and they will become influential members of the Islamic society, given the hopes of the Ummah are pinned on the children (because they are the future).
Keeping the child well-raised is achieved by teaching him good conducts:
Dear brother, pay attention to the following crucial fact about raising children: The child is like a blank sheet of paper, and this is what the Prophet PBUH referred to in the following famous Hadith:
((Abu Hurairah reported Allah's Messenger (PBUH) as saying: No child is born but upon Fitrah.))
This aspect is referred to in the Noble Quran when Allah the Almighty says:
﴾ Allah's Fitrah (i.e. Allah's Islamic Monotheism), with which He has created mankind. No change let there be in Khalq-illah(i.e. the Religion of Allah Islamic Monotheism),﴿
This means that Allah gives you your child and makes him like a blank sheet of paper after providing him with a very exalted Fitrah, and it is up to the parents to fill this blank sheet of paper. Thus, they should fill it with good words and exalted morals, because when the exalted Fitrah of people is combined with sound faith, exalted morals and good upbringing, the coming generation will be fine, but when the parent neglects raising his child rightly, the child's Fitrah will be stained until the pure one is effaced. Hence, the Fitrah of the newborn baby is pure and the parents' mission is to feed this Fitrah with Islamic upbringing, upright guidance and correct instruction.
Dear brother, Imam Al-Ghazali, may Allah have mercy on his soul, was one of the greatest educators in the Muslim world, and he authored lots of books about the Islamic education. He said, "The child is a trust in the hands of his parents, and his pure heart is like a precious uncut jewel, devoid of any form or carving, so if he is made accustomed to good and is so taught, he will grow up in goodness, he will win happiness in this world and the next and his parents and teachers will have a share in this reward. On the other hand, if he is accustomed to evil and is neglected like the beasts, he will be woeful and lost, and the burden will then be upon the neck of those responsible for him. Thus, a child should be exaltedly educated, cultivated and taught the good morals."
Instilling believing in Allah in our children's hearts:
1- We should draw their attention to the signs Allah left for us in the universe:
Dear brother, how can we instill faith in our children? The Noble Quran teaches us how to do that, since the Quran includes all the answers to our questions. Allah the Almighty says:
﴾ He it is Who sends down water (rain) from the sky; from it you drink and from it (grows) the vegetation on which you send your cattle to pasture;﴿
This means if it rains do not miss this chance to tell your son that this rain is from Allah, and that it manifests His Mercy. Our ancestors used to call the rain "Al-ghaith" (The aid), because it is the means to grow plants, grass, crops and olives…etc.
﴾ He it is Who sends down water (rain) from the sky; from it you drink and from it (grows) the vegetation on which you send your cattle to pasture* With it He causes to grow for you the crops, the olives, the date-palms, the grapes, and every kind of fruit. Verily! In this is indeed an evident proof and a manifest sign for people who give thought.﴿
This is how you should teach your son.
﴾ And He has subjected to you the night and the day, the sun and the moon; and the stars are subjected by His Command. Surely, in this are proofs for people who understand* And whatsoever He has created for you on this earth of varying colours [and qualities from vegetation and fruits, etc. (botanical life) and from animal (zoological life)]. Verily! In this is a sign for people who remember* And He it is Who has subjected the sea (to you), that you eat thereof fresh tender meat (i.e. fish), and that you bring forth out of it ornaments to wear. And you see the ships ploughing through it, that you may seek (thus) of His Bounty (by transporting the goods from place to place) and that you may be grateful* And He has affixed into the earth mountains standing firm, lest it should shake with you, and rivers and roads, that you may guide yourselves* And landmarks (signposts, etc. during the day) and by the stars (during the night), they (mankind) guide themselves* Is then He, Who creates as one who creates not? Will you not then remember?﴿
Every word in these Ayat needs a long lecture. If your son gets to know that the mountains, the rain, the seas with all their fishes and the air with all its birds are Allah's creation, and that their functions are so and so, he will know that behind this universe there is Great Creator, Merciful Educator and Wise Disposer of affairs.
Dear brother, you should draw your son's attention to the signs in the universe which Allah has left for us in the heavens and the earth in order to reflect on them.
2- We should teach them submission to Allah:
Teach your son to be submissive to Allah. Allah the Almighty says:
﴾ Allah has sent down the best statement, a Book (this Qur'an), its parts resembling each other in goodness and truth, oft-repeated. The skins of those who fear their Lord shiver from it (when they reauthor it or hear it). ﴿
Does your skin shiver upon reciting the Noble Quran?
﴾ The believers are only those who, when Allah is mentioned, feel a fear in their hearts﴿
This is a second sign. Also, the following Ayah indicates one more sign of submission to Allah the Almighty:
﴾ When the Verses of the Most Beneficent (Allah) were reauthord unto them, they fell down prostrating and weeping.﴿
Teach him how to get to know Allah the Almighty through reflecting on this universe, and teach him how to have a submissive heart to such an extent that whenever he reauthors the Quran, his skin will shiver and his eyes will be welled with tears.
3- We should teach them that Allah is watching them:
Dear brother, pay attention to the following Hadith:
((Ibn Mas'ud (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said to me: "Reauthor the Qur'an to me". I said, "O Messenger of Allah! Shall I reauthor the Qur'an to you, when it has been revealed to you?" He (PBUH) replied, "I love to hear it reauthord by sh3er". So I reauthord to him a portion from Surat An-Nisa'. When I reached the Ayah: "How (will it be) then, when We bring from each nation a witness and We bring you (O Muhammad PBUH) as a witness against these people?" [An-Nisa', 41]. He (PBUH) said, "Enough for now". When I looked at him I saw his eyes were shedding tears."))
Dear brother, you should teach your son that Allah is watching him, and this sense of Muraqabah is strengthened when he believes in Allah, and when his heart becomes submissive to Him. Sahl Ibn Abdullah Ibn Yunus, Abu Muhammad At-Tustari the master of knowers (Shaykh Al-Arifîn), the ascetic Sufi (As-Suufî Az-Aâhid), and he has a firm foothold in the path, when he was 5 years old, he said, "When I was three years old, he would wake up at night to watch his uncle Muhammad Ibn As-Sawwar pray.
My uncle once told me, 'Remember Allah Who created you.' I said, 'How should I remember him?' He replied, 'Say in your heart, whenever you are alone at night, three times, without moving your tongue: Allah is with me; Allah is looking at me; Allah is watching me.'" Then later on he asked me to say it 7 times, and later on he asked me to say it 11 times and then he asked me to say it always for it will benefit me in the worldly life and in the Hereafter. I promised him and I kept my promise for years until I found sweetness in my soul, and then my uncle said to me one day, "O Sahl, will the one who knows that Allah is watching him, looking at him and observing him commit any sin?" I said: "No!" He said, "Do not ever commit a sin."
This is a very valuable lesson and it is a nice way to teach children. You should devote yourself to educate your children, and you should put the efforts and time, so that they will become your supply and ongoing Sadaqah from which you keep gaining rewards even after your death.
Dear brother, an Arab philosopher said, "Morals do not exist without three beliefs: The first belief is to believe in Allah, the second belief is to believe in the eternity of the soul and the third belief is to believe that there will be reckoning after death." Without these three beliefs, man cannot be a man of morality.
Dear brother, call yourselves to account before you are called to do so, and weigh your deeds before they are weighed against you, and you should know that the Angel of Death has reached sh3er and will reach us soon, so pay heed. The wise man is the one who calls himself to account (and refrains from doing evil deeds) and does noble deeds to benefit him after death; and the foolish person is the one who subdues himself to his temptations and desires and seeks from Allah the fulfillment of his vain desires.
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds.
The supplication:
O Allah, we beseech You to show us the way of righteousness together with those to whom You showed it; and to give us good health together with those whom You have healed; and to be our Protector, as You are of those whom You protect; and to bless what You have bestowed on us; and to save us from the affliction that You have decreed –for You rule with justice and You are never judged.
O Allah, increase us [in Your Blessings] and do not decrease us, honor us and do not humiliate us, give us [from Your Gifts] and do not deprive us, be in favor of us and not against us, and make us satisfied and be satisfied with us.
O Allah! Give us a share of fear of You that will keep us from disobeying You, and a share of obedience to You that will drive us to Your Paradise, and a share of firm belief [in You] that will make easy for us the calamities of the world. O Allah! Make us enjoy our [full] hearing, sight, and health all along our lifetimes, and make them our heirs [i.e., keep them strong until we die], and grant us revenge over those who have wronged us, and grant us victory over those who antagonize us, and do not cause our problems to be concerning our religious commitment, and do not make our worldly life the most concern for us or the utmost of our knowledge, and do not empower over us those who do not fear You or have mercy on us, O Lord of the Worlds.
O Allah, make us do well in the Deen, which is our dignity, make us do well in our worldly life, in which we dwell and grant us safety on the Day of Judgment for it is our Final Destination. O Allah! Please supply our life with all good things and make our death a rest from every evil, O Lord of the Worlds.
O Allah conceal our shortcomings, grant us security and let us be safe in our countries, and make this country and all other Islamic countries safe and rich, O Lord of the Worlds.
O Allah, send us rain and do not make us helpless, and do not afflict us with drought, or punish us for the bad deeds of the wrongdoers, O Lord of the World.
O Allah, by Your Mercy and Benevolence, raise high the word of truth and this Deen, grant triumph to Islam, dignify Muslims and lead the rulers of Muslims to what pleases You, O Lord of the Worlds, as You are the only One Who is capable over His decreed.
